I dreamt about the old ways of the Samurai, and about how love served as a function in their society. In my dream, I knew in my gut who the love of my life was, and he had a face (editor's note: at this point in my life, my ex is the biggest love I'd known so it only made sense that his face was featured in my dream, so for the purpose of this story, we'll say his name is 'KD'). Rewinding back to the beginning of the dream, it started on a cruise. On this cruise, was everyone I knew from my life from my secondary school days. I swam on the boat, almost all day long, and never left the cruise ship even when we docked. I don't recall if I wore a bikini. All I know is that I never ate on the cruise but had lots of conversations with old friends. To break down the floors of this huge cruise ship - the dining room was on level 6, my room was on level 7, the swimming happened all on level 12. Once I accidentally pressed level 24. The elevator rocketed to the top, and it was only when I saw the red digits on the panel 24 then did I realise I pushed the wrong button. It was a clear glass bubble elevator. The elevator did a slight free fall from 24 to 19, to 12 to 7. I turned around to see the outside world. The entire time as the elevator free-fell, (change of scene, I'm not one a cruise ship anymore) there was a man standing in the middle of tall glass and iron buildings which lined the long avenue. We locked eyes, and didn't unlock them as I felt my feet lift from the elevator floor as I free-fell. The elevator came to a slow halt at my floor, as if easing back into gravity. I was not scared. Back to the cruise. KD and I had split, and everyone on the cruise-ship found out. KD never came "home" after we split (I called it home for some reason), and I slept alone in the cruise's bedroom. Days following, I swam around the boat myself. Ignoring all the random cat-calls from people/strangers/friends. I saw the most beautiful sunsets by myself. Groups of beautiful people calling me to join them and their parties. They were friends and strangers, yet I declined all their invitations. Jump to fireworks set off into the sky from the cruise into the night sky. Jump to deep diving into the cruise pools. Beautiful deep blue, dark navy tiles. I scanned the pool floors. There was something on the floor, not significant to me, I didn't touch it or pick it up.


My dream moved into the samurai age. Everyone was decked out in traditional kimonos. Other ladies featured in this dream would be one of my closest friends in Calgary. Her name is AM. One other young girl, and lots of other ladies. The ladies gather around, and stories are shared about how when a love is called upon in times of need, the talisman turns colors. Like bad omens, you know when something wrong is going to happen to your loved ones. The ladies and I take classes on how-to-be. I learned about the nature of these talismans. I understand that the samurai can only survive with a partner who has an unyielding, unwavering kind of trust in each other. In our training, the girls wait in the huge open central spaces of the temple. We go through the motions of the exercise. Sensei says, "You have to want to be here to get your lover here. They can only find you when your chi calls them. They are searching for you." In the distance, we see and hear the trees in the distance rustle. Like ninjas flying through the air, the darkness shields them, but you can make them out. You know what is coming for you. In this exercise, the ladies shoot long sheets of strong silk out from their bell-shaped kimono sleeves. These silk sheets fly with such tenacity, like in the oriental ancient movies. A natural reaction follows, the ninja (her love) catches the silk sheet and slides down towards them. All the ninjas land safely. All except one. KD is missing. I realise that I am not fully participating in the exercise. I'm not at the temple training with the ladies. I am at a different location, sitting at the base of the mountain temple. I am in a kimono, dancing a ritual in front of hundreds of people. The audience is enjoying the show. I am showing a gentleman how to fold a long beautiful printed silk sheet. Lay it flat length-wise, half it, drag it from the centre left a bit. You have to take one step on the fold, one foot off it. I explain that if it is done right, you can run on it. The other people do a little run on it, and we all laugh. Suddenly, I feel a deep urge in my stomach. Like a bad omen. I look at my talisman. Its colour changes. I look back at the audience and the silk sheet below me and I commit to finishing the show. I acknowledge that pride is everything in this culture. One cannot leave a commitment, or your reputation will be tainted for it. My gut feels worse, I am completely aware that something wrong is happening to KD. In the middle of my routine, I stand abruptly, apologise, show the elders my talisman, and the crowd gasps in fear. They understand the severity of the situation. The elders send me away quickly, offering ninja escorts. I take the ninja escorts, happy to have them. And I fly. A flight so impressive over buildings and up the mountain side. Elders shoot fireworks like bullets into the foliage, cutting down trees, shooting into the sky, dragging the stars down to help light the way. It is beautiful. Colorful. Bright. 100% helpful. This is all happening from a 3rd-party's perspective from the the showcase area at the base of the mountain, not from my first-person view as I fly through the trees. Finally, I arrive at the temple where the ladies are training. Everyone is now with their partners, successfully landing their first mission. KD is nowhere in sight. KD didn't have an aura to find. He is injured somewhere in the forest. I give my wishes to the sensei. Dream ends.